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You Do You

“One of the best pieces of advice I received from another mum friend was how important it is to say no when life feels too full. I still have to remind myself to set boundaries that work for me and the family. ‘You do you’ is a great reminder on how to be kind to ourselves.” Love Izzy x

Why does this matter?

We all have different needs at different times, and we’re all struggling in different – often invisible – ways

Social media, modern culture and the stresses of the pandemic all make it harder to tune into our own instincts. So go easy on yourself, because it it takes practice

By walking our own path, we also teach the kids how to be kind to themselves and respect their own unique needs

There are many aspects of parenting that can be really triggering, and this year the heightened anxiety and forced isolation mean the perfection and comparison monkeys are out to play like never before. It’s easy to feel vulnerable, both for ourselves and for our kids, and we all fall into that trap of thinking everyone else is coping better than we are.

So this is just an invitation to stay in your own lane. To do it your way, at your pace, whatever that looks like for you. Imagine the two parallel lines of the pause symbol and put yourself and a few other like-minded lovelies in one lane (you can of course choose different people for different issues!), and everyone else in the other. Be sure to respect the other lane, but keep your energy in yours.

It might seem to you like others have had calmer lockdowns, more wholesome fun over the school holidays, or are somehow managing to spin all the plates ‘better’ than you. Just know that someone else is looking at you and thinking just the same, and that we’re all struggling in different – often invisible – ways.

It can help to tune in and get familiar with your own internal alarm system, and how to listen when your body says ‘no’, even when other people are saying ‘yes’. It can feel uncomfortable saying ‘no’ to things that don’t work for you, but setting healthy boundaries around work, family and personal commitments, and getting clear on your personal Covid comfort zones, will benefit the whole family.

So today, be kind to yourself. Lower your expectations, soften the comparisons and delete some shoulds. You do you, because that is more than enough.

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